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Posted on Wednesday February 22nd
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This is just like that time on the fucking school bus.
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About me
* I was the kid with 8 imaginary friends and I chose to kill off the 9th one off just because it was an uneven amount.* I was the kid who danced so hardcore to the Mortal Kombat theme song that I broke furniture.
* I was the kid that put all the crayon shavings into one pile and then threw them at people thinking that they would explode violently into vibrant rainbows.
* I was the kid who slept with all the blankets over her head because they were the all mighty powerful blankets that could protect you no matter what.
* I was the kid that thought the definition of a salad was cheetos, doritos and other fattening potato chips mixed together.
* I was the kid who hid in the clothes rack at JCPenneys thinking that it was my jungle kingdom (with mystical jungle sounds included).
* I was the kid who asked for the deluxe edition dinosaur encyclopedia for Christmas.
* I was the kid that thought tentacles were the same as testicles, horror was the same as whore, and that the sermon on the mount was the “serpent” on the mount.
* I was the kid who convinced herself there was a separate heaven for the bugs to go to so I wouldn’t have to face them later on in the afterlife.
* I was the kid who had to read the bible almost every day and used to imagine the biblical characters on Price is Right hosted by Jesus Christ.
* I was the kid that crushed the ants with the sidewalk chalk.
* I was the kid who believed that dummys and porclein dolls were trying to suck out my soul if I stared at them long enough.
* I was the kid who ate giant balls of snow.
* I was the kid who loved to play bingo and perform shows for old senior citizens at a nursing home (even though I secretly disliked their smell and large pulsing veins.)
* I was the kid who dunked the Barbie’s heads in white out and smothered their faces in clay.
* I was the kid who mixed dirt at the playground and opened up my own imaginary bakery at the park.
* I was the kid who was always picked as the soccer goalie because I didn’t mind getting hit or even if I had to grab some balls.
* I was the kid who actually waited for her acceptance letter to Hogwarts.
* I was the kid who made up names and songs for all the inanimate objects around her.
I AM and will always be that strange freckle face child, the one, the only- chelsea.
